Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: August 22nd, 2023, 12:44 pm
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You can't make this stuff up!
https://www.crazietalk.net/ourhouse/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=5673
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Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: October 19th, 2023, 10:56 am
Got a guy charged with stealing his baby mama's mother's ashes from her motel room.
Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: October 19th, 2023, 10:57 am
Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: October 23rd, 2023, 11:39 am
Tattoos should be spell-checked PRIOR to their application. Coworker Awbrey just showed me pictures of a victim who has the, um, "word" "Royaty" tattooed across her chest.
Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: October 23rd, 2023, 12:02 pm
Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: October 25th, 2023, 9:21 am
Virginia is a Commonwealth, not a state. This is meaningless except to graduates of Virginia COMMONWEALTH University, and I suppose a few stuffed shirts in Richmond.
Saying that, I am continually amazed by the annoyances that inmates and their families blame on being in a Commonwealth.
My bank robber who is set for court on Monday just told his mama they don't get to watch the NFL in his pod. Mama's response? "Well, Virginia is a Commonwealth."
Saying that, I am continually amazed by the annoyances that inmates and their families blame on being in a Commonwealth.
My bank robber who is set for court on Monday just told his mama they don't get to watch the NFL in his pod. Mama's response? "Well, Virginia is a Commonwealth."
Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: October 27th, 2023, 11:31 am
Not to be outdone with their previous call...
Bank robber's daddy passed away this past Monday. (I'm genuinely sorry about this; I liked the man, even if his sons were of less than sterling character. May he RIP.)
Bank robber was on the phone last night with his mama. (The parents are divorced; mama has a new husband.) Mama is talking about Daddy's remains. She says, "you should put him in a place where he was the happiest. I think it would be the FLEA MARKET.
And yes, she was quite serious. And no, they are not from Varnish County. They are from somewhere in New York.
Bank robber's daddy passed away this past Monday. (I'm genuinely sorry about this; I liked the man, even if his sons were of less than sterling character. May he RIP.)
Bank robber was on the phone last night with his mama. (The parents are divorced; mama has a new husband.) Mama is talking about Daddy's remains. She says, "you should put him in a place where he was the happiest. I think it would be the FLEA MARKET.
And yes, she was quite serious. And no, they are not from Varnish County. They are from somewhere in New York.
Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: October 27th, 2023, 2:23 pm
lawgrad91 wrote: ↑October 27th, 2023, 11:31 amNot to be outdone with their previous call...
Bank robber's daddy passed away this past Monday. (I'm genuinely sorry about this; I liked the man, even if his sons were of less than sterling character. May he RIP.)
Bank robber was on the phone last night with his mama. (The parents are divorced; mama has a new husband.) Mama is talking about Daddy's remains. She says, "you should put him in a place where he was the happiest. I think it would be the FLEA MARKET.
And yes, she was quite serious. And no, they are not from Varnish County. They are from somewhere in New York.
Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: November 29th, 2023, 1:22 pm
Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: December 18th, 2023, 9:09 am
I have a defendant on the traffic docket whose first name is “Espin.”
Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: December 18th, 2023, 10:21 am
Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: December 18th, 2023, 12:51 pm
Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: December 26th, 2023, 4:32 pm
Deputies received a call yesterday regarding an assault, and when they met with the two assaulted individuals, they said they had been attacked by Santa and the Grinch. BTW, the neighbors were literally dressed as Santa and the Grinch.
Alcohol was involved all around, and no one ended up getting arrested. Whew.
Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: January 1st, 2024, 11:54 am
lawgrad91 wrote: ↑December 26th, 2023, 4:32 pm
BTW, the neighbors were literally dressed as Santa and the Grinch.
Alcohol was involved all around, and no one ended up getting arrested. Whew.
Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: January 4th, 2024, 10:34 am
Update: all parties went to the magistrate's office and took out private warrants on each other. Santa, the Grinch, and the two assaulted individuals.lawgrad91 wrote: ↑December 26th, 2023, 4:32 pm
BTW, the neighbors were literally dressed as Santa and the Grinch.
Alcohol was involved all around, and no one ended up getting arrested. Whew.
We are going to drop all charges. Perhaps we should set them all up in a rasslin' ring on a Saturday night at Bassett High School, and make some money.
Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: January 4th, 2024, 12:10 pm
Put them all on the naughty list and send them to bed without supper.lawgrad91 wrote: ↑January 4th, 2024, 10:34 amUpdate: all parties went to the magistrate's office and took out private warrants on each other. Santa, the Grinch, and the two assaulted individuals.lawgrad91 wrote: ↑December 26th, 2023, 4:32 pm
BTW, the neighbors were literally dressed as Santa and the Grinch.
Alcohol was involved all around, and no one ended up getting arrested. Whew.
We are going to drop all charges. Perhaps we should set them all up in a rasslin' ring on a Saturday night at Bassett High School, and make some money.
Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: February 23rd, 2024, 9:22 pm
Too long between posts….
Tonight the 911 center got a call from the Patrick County Sheriff’s Office. Apparently a UPS driver stopped at an address in Henry County, and a chicken jumped in the truck while he was stopped.
Henny Penny rode all the way to Patrick County and jumped out at the sheriff’s office, where deputies are chasing her in the parking lot with an eye to returning her to her home. Patrick Co wanted Henry Co to know in case there was a call regarding a chicken thief.
Tonight the 911 center got a call from the Patrick County Sheriff’s Office. Apparently a UPS driver stopped at an address in Henry County, and a chicken jumped in the truck while he was stopped.
Henny Penny rode all the way to Patrick County and jumped out at the sheriff’s office, where deputies are chasing her in the parking lot with an eye to returning her to her home. Patrick Co wanted Henry Co to know in case there was a call regarding a chicken thief.
Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: February 23rd, 2024, 9:54 pm
lawgrad91 wrote: ↑February 23rd, 2024, 9:22 pmToo long between posts….
Tonight the 911 center got a call from the Patrick County Sheriff’s Office. Apparently a UPS driver stopped at an address in Henry County, and a chicken jumped in the truck while he was stopped.
Henny Penny rode all the way to Patrick County and jumped out at the sheriff’s office, where deputies are chasing her in the parking lot with an eye to returning her to her home. Patrick Co wanted Henry Co to know in case there was a call regarding a chicken thief.
Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: February 24th, 2024, 6:43 pm
The case of the perfect emoticon has been solved!CameronBornAndBred wrote: ↑February 23rd, 2024, 9:54 pmlawgrad91 wrote: ↑February 23rd, 2024, 9:22 pmToo long between posts….
Tonight the 911 center got a call from the Patrick County Sheriff’s Office. Apparently a UPS driver stopped at an address in Henry County, and a chicken jumped in the truck while he was stopped.
Henny Penny rode all the way to Patrick County and jumped out at the sheriff’s office, where deputies are chasing her in the parking lot with an eye to returning her to her home. Patrick Co wanted Henry Co to know in case there was a call regarding a chicken thief.
Re: You can't make this stuff up!
Posted: February 25th, 2024, 10:40 am
I have never seen a more apt emoticon.Phredd3 wrote: ↑February 24th, 2024, 6:43 pmThe case of the perfect emoticon has been solved!CameronBornAndBred wrote: ↑February 23rd, 2024, 9:54 pmlawgrad91 wrote: ↑February 23rd, 2024, 9:22 pmToo long between posts….
Tonight the 911 center got a call from the Patrick County Sheriff’s Office. Apparently a UPS driver stopped at an address in Henry County, and a chicken jumped in the truck while he was stopped.
Henny Penny rode all the way to Patrick County and jumped out at the sheriff’s office, where deputies are chasing her in the parking lot with an eye to returning her to her home. Patrick Co wanted Henry Co to know in case there was a call regarding a chicken thief.
Besides 9F, anyway….